| Date: 02 Apr 2008 |
| Question: i hate coming to the meetings. i hate seeing some of the saints. i feel like if i don't do well right now then my entire life will be messed up. i hate it when i hear someone calling on the name of the lord or when i see someone enjoying the lord. why? because i can't seem to get that enjoyment which in turn causes me to hate whoever is receiving that enjoyment. why? on the outside i play around and just play it off but inside i am actually crying and full of anger. i can't take it anymore. i have heard all of that oh lord jesus stuff and all of the "life" things. but i don't know. and i don't want tohear it. why? wanna help me? |
| Answer: To the YP who wrote anonymously on the YP's website: We really appreciated your opening your heart to us and have been very concerned and have been praying for you. We really desire to help you. Since you want to remain anonymous, we only have the following suggestion: To help you, we encourage you to talk to one of the serving ones whom you trust or a mature adult in the Lord. If we knew who you were we could consider before the Lord who might be the one that can render the best help to you. Thank you for sharing your genuine and honest heart with us. We would rather not give you a general answer, since we feel your need is very specific. We love you and want to care for you in the best way. |
| Answer: To the YP who wrote anonymously on the YP's website: I am a fellow young person in the Lord. It was not until recently that I began to come more and more into the Lord. I always used to just put an act out for everyone, so that everyone would think that I was deeply rooted in the Lord. I never used to understand how everyone could just call upon the Lord and receive him. I thought everyone was also putting up an act. So this is what happened. I wanted to know, are these people truly enjoying the Lord or are they just acting, why is it that I do not feel the same thing as they do when I call upon his name, why do I find this so boring? So I just prayed. I prayed to the lord that he would take away the veils from me, that he would open my eyes that I may see, that he would make me no longer deaf so I could hear, and no longer dumb so I could understand. I just consecrated myself to him, I truly just opened my heart to him in that prayer. I asked that he would do with me as he pleased, for his good pleasure. That he would take me and that I would take him. Soon after, I don't really remember what happened, but all I know is that I understood, I understood that the Lord is good, that all we need to do is call upon his name, that all we need to do is to pursue him willingly and he will do the rest. I do not know if my testimony will help you in any way, but I do know that whatever happens, just try praying to him. Pray honestly. And remember, just taste and see that the Lord is good. |
| Answer: To the YP who wrote anonymously on the YP's website: I can totally relate to your frustration. When I was 11 years old, I wondered if all the saints loving the Lord was pretentious, how could they love someone they never even seen or met? I was soo sad, frustrated, one day I cried to a serving one I trusted, how horrible I felt that I couldn't love the Lord, was something wrong with me? Before learning to love the Lord, I thought everyone was crazy. But the serving one, she just held my hands and said: "Sister So-So, no one can love the Lord with their own love. It's humanly impossible." So how and why are so many millions of people loving the Lord? "When you want your mom to come to you, what do you do? You call on her. To get to know the Lord, call Him to come to you." "Today, I want you to go to your room, shut the door and say: LORD JESUS, OH LORD JESUS I LOVE YOU! Say it non-stop until His love truly floods your heart and then you will love Him with His love." What, I thought that's even crazier, I'd be lying, I didn't love the Lord. The sister said, it doesn't matter that you have no love for the Lord, HE WILL FLOOD YOU with His TRUE LOVE if you just tell Him, just ask Him. That day after the meeting, I locked myself in my room and just shouted: "LORD JESUS, LORD JESUS! OH LORD JESUS! I don't know You, but I WANT to know You. Lord Jesus I love You. Lord Jesus I love You." I repeated it for 3 hours nonstop, just like the sister told me. When I finished, I couldn't believe how much God's love flooded me. I was crying sadness before, now I was crying tears of joy, of God's love inside me. Oh my, I felt so free! God freed me! Just open up my mouth and shout for Him to come in! The Lord never forces Himself on us, He always waits for us to ask Him to come in. Just do it! "Lord Jesus I love You! Lord Jesus I love You! Lord Jesus I love You!" Try it non-stop until His love floods you. |